Tension and disagreement are inevitable when discussing (investment) ideas and plans. They are essential for gaining new insights and perspectives and, if dealt with properly, often lead to better understanding (and, as a result, better decisions and outcomes). But there’s a difference between healthy and unhealthy conflict. Here are four ways to make conflicts productive.
Say it’s ok. Normalise disagreement. Tell them it’s expected and normal. Also, it is essential to work together and make improvements. However, the rules in the ‘boxing’ ring should be defined, and explicit norms should be set: focus on the issue, not people, and respect different perspectives. When conflict arises, remind them it’s a sign of engagement, not dysfunction.
Name positive tensions. Identify recurring tensions—like communication, personal style, details or big picture, speed vs. quality —and call them out when they appear. This reframes conflict as a natural dynamic, not a personal issue, and helps you balance competing priorities.
Depersonalize. Separate people from problems. Ask people to argue against their perspective to consider alternate ways of thinking. What would the middle ground look like? This exercise builds empathy, fosters open-mindedness, and reduces defensiveness during debates.
Stay calm. Your reaction sets the tone. When conflict arises, model curiosity. A steady presence makes it safe for others to speak up. If tensions rise, gently steer the conversation back to shared goals.
That said, tensions are inevitable and encouraging positive ones can create an environment where people feel safe to voice their opinions and ideas, leading to better decisions and results.
